Thursday, June 26, 2014

Getting That Booze into an Event

     I can still remember all of the ways that I have tried over the years to sneak booze into an event, some very successful and some not so much.  I ran across this article the other day and thought that you would enjoy reading some of the many ways they have devised to pull off getting your booze into an event.

"10 crafty ways to sneak alcohol into festivals"
It's not big, and it's not clever (except, it kind of is).
There are still plenty of festivals on the agenda for this summer, which means plenty more chances to perfect the art of sneaking in booze.

Festivals are expensive things – us poor lowly folks have to watch the pennies and see if we can claw back the cash somewhere.

Naughty?   Yes.
 Necessary?   You  betcha.

1. Crotch Wine
Buy a box of wine. Take out the wine bladder (as it is affectionately known) – stuff it down your jeans. Also allows for hilarity later on when you stick the nozzle out your fly to pour people drinks.

2. Drunk Wellies
People don't wear those silly patterned wellies at festivals to look cool – they do it to distract from the hip flasks and miniatures they have stuffed down there.

3. Backpack
We don't mean in
your actual backpack – that would be too obvious. We mean duct tape your hip flask or some stubbies to your back. Oversized clothing or a big coat is essential.

4. Bye Bye Pockets
Wear an old jacket to keep you warm. Cut holes in the pockets and drop miniatures into the lining of your coat, Genius.

5. Bra Booze
Finally the  wearing of bras pays off.   Hello hip flask smuggling device.

6. Pringles Tube of Glory
Step one, eat Pringles.  Step two, fill empty Pringles can with bottles of booze.   Then pop it in your bag and go in all calm like 'these are just my snacks, man.'

7. Sun Cream Bottle
First, thoroughly wash out (and we mean thoroughly) an empty
bottle of sun cream. Refill with your booze of choice.

8. Pregnant Belly
Strap a camelback to your stomach and pretend you are with child. Overacting and waddling optional.

9. Stealth Hip Flask
These days you can get hip flasks that look like just about anything (except a hipflask), Binoculars, canes, lipsticks, or this mobile phone.
Hello, is that Jack? Jack Daniels?

10. Not-So-Healthy Fruit
Then the old stand-by, drunk fruit.  Inject oranges with rum. Desperate times call for hammered oranges.

     Don't get caught it could get you thrown out and an expensive ticket to get in would be lost, but to each their own decision.  ;o)